New Music Video, Details on My Lost Weekend, and a Lengthy Lamentation on Temporary American Poverty

Okay:

Ever heard of John Lenon's "lost weekend"? Well, this was my lost weekend, except I wasn't off with my wife-approved mistress somewheres. I was at home alone, working to promote the new album. Also, I am flat broke, so I couldn't leave my apartment even if I wanted to.

You've heard the term "flat broke" before. I know I have. But I'm just now coming to understand exactly what it means. Of course, as a citizen of the world, I have some perspective. I'm not Rio de Jinero broke. I'm not Johannesburg broke. I'm in that unique state of temporary American poverty. I'll have some money soon. Payday's Friday. And I have some checks coming in from some contract writing. But for the time being, I'm confined to my quarters and relegated to the surprisingly fun task of making meals out of, what they call in the restaurant business, side items.

Tonight's meal: Tuna Salad, Vegetarian Beans and Apple Sauce. Accompanied by one ice cold glass of Arcadia Spring Water. (The gallon has to last me the whole week). I think it's actually going to be quite tasty.

Luckily, my daughter is out of town with her grandmother and aunt. I would hate for her to see me in this pathetic state. I haven't brushed my teeth since Friday, and, pardon my candor, but I can smell my own balls.

But it has been a productive two days. I finished editing the video for the first leaked track from the new album. Check it out.

Pretty cool if I may say so myself, and it didn't cost me a dime. Just a few hours in front of the computer. Which, however, according to my sister the stock broker, can be monetized into a specific dollar amount using a simple formula.

I did some other things. I vacuumed the living room and did the dishes. I discovered that there is no real way to keep a white trash can looking sanitary and promised myself I would go stainless steel as soon as I get some financial slack. I also need new break pads, a welcome mat, a new shower curtain, a new driver's side view mirror, electric clippers, an ironing board and a new mount for my front license plate which fell off some time last year.

Oh, and I would like a wine rack and some bottles to go in it.

And a new set of pots and pans. And a cooking apron.

And I'd like to have the upholstery in my car cleaned. And have all the nicks and dents bumped out.

A pull up bar for my bedroom and those push-up twisty disc thingies.

And a pair of red cowboy boots.

And some new suits. I'm over the loose fit. I want something that's gonna make me look skinny and well-traveled.

And I want a briefcase and a laptop with wi-fi.

And a pony.


Thanks for reading.

Tip of the Day: Never have sex in the bathroom at the Johnny Rockets in Georgetown. The management really frowns upon that sort of thing. Trust me.

Postscript: The Leak Continues later this week, so stay tuned.