Sunday, July 27, 2008

All Apologies

Okay:

So, I guess this was bound to happen.

When I started this blog, almost a year ago to the day, I did it to get back in the habit of writing. I am a writer, and as a friend reminded me recently, a writer writes. I didn't set out to become the male Karrine Stephans or anything like that. I've just got a nasty mind and a sarcastic sense of humor.

In the beginning, I felt like I was taking great measures not to violate the privacy of those close to me by obscuring identities with altered details, times, locations, circumstances, etc.

In retrospect, it seems silly. But that's what I thought.

Maybe at one point I was doing a pretty good job of it, but I guess I got lost in sauce as they say. As the popularity increased from a dozen reads a day to hundreds, I started to feel like finally, at least one of my artistic endeavors was getting the kind of attention it deserved. It felt good. Still does.

But coming up with something clever, humorous or thought-provoking to write about everyday became increasingly difficult. So, somewhere along the line, I forgot my boundaries.

Subsequently innocent people got hurt.

I am a narcissistic, arrogant prick. I've never claimed anything otherwise, but everyone has a right to their privacy. And I'm not so large of an asshole that I don't understand that.

I also understand that if you're going to make a public mistake, you must also make a public apology. And what better place to do it.

And, no, I'm not going to name names or direct you to the specific posts where lines were crossed. Most of them have been deleted, and I'll be spending at least the remainder of the week, fishing through every post to see where else I have made this mistake.

There's nothing cool or funny about hurting people's feelings.

I considered taking down the site and discontinuing my blog altogether, but I thought better of it. This is not a political blog, or a gossip blog or a trade blog. This is supposed to be about real life here. My life. And what could be realer than this?

I simply have to be more careful and considerate. And the truth is, this is all just a symptom of a larger problem. I gotta grow up.

This does not mean that things will be any less real, any less entertaining, or funny. I'll still be talking about the same kinds of shit. But a shift in focus is necessary.

I'll be 30 in a year. Time to start acting like a man.

I hope those of you who read this blog on a regular basis understand and respect where I'm coming from on this. I hope that those of you who know me personally and feel that I have violated your privacy in any way can find it in your hearts to forgive. As Jesse the Castrator said at the 1984 Democratic National Convention, charge it to my head.

My sincerest apologies.


Also, I'd like you all to join me in offering condolences to my partner Joe D, who recently lost his brother. He was a good friend and an enthusiastic supporter of our endeavors. He is missed.



Thanks for reading.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

she must have really cussed you out...

Akil Nadir said...

Sure did. But I'm not too big to be checked when I'm wrong. Not yet at least ;-)

Mizrepresent said...

Well, i have enjoyed your blog, and your overwhelming sentiments. I hope you keep doing you and you come back. I'll be here, well at least on Mondays and Saturdays.

Anonymous said...

Damn, condolences to Joe D. Guess I need to reach out and send a message or something... But hopefully your blogs will remain true to who Claude is with a little tact mixed in. :-) As always this was a good read.

Akil Nadir said...

Thanks, folks. No worries. I'm clearly still at it. Sometimes you have to take a step backward to take a big step forward. It's a beautiful thing.